F. C. Kerbeck is famous for selling great cars. Cadillac, Buick, GMC….. Rolls Royce, Bentley, Lamborghini, Maserati. That’s what they advertise so when they received a fantastically gorgeous Jaguar they sort of didn’t know how to sell it. Well, they are car people so they know a lot about how to sell a car but they know some cars far better than the others. They sell, for example, Chevrolets but they aren’t known for selling Chevvies. Same for Jags but they know when a car is very special so they gave it a shot and put a full size Jag on their lot with the extra special cars, the Maserati’s, the Aventadors, ….yep. plural. They have more than one.
The Rolls aren’t kept outside. They are in a special showroom that’s reached by elevator. Rolls are very, very special cars and they simply don’t belong with the other cars. They are separate because, … well, you owe it to yourself to look closely at a Rolls. Talk to Paul. If you are serious about buying a Rolls, Paul is the Rolls guy. He lives and breathes Rolls. Rolls sends him to England to learn about Rollers. Special…. A Roller is very special. Sorry for over-using “very” but I’m easily overwhelmed by these special cars and if I have enough money I’ll get one.

Back to the Jag. It’s an XJ model. Has a supercharger. Has cooled seats. Has the name “Jaguar” on the floor-plate that you see under the door when it’s opened. Its lit. It has gorgeous blus lighting that is so unique, so stand-outish that you catch your breath when you open the door, especially at night. I bought the Jag and didn’t see the “Jaguar” lit up until that night. I called Paul and thanked him for selling me this part of heaven.
The XJ is a sedan. Four doors, room for car-seats for the small kids. Touch screen for directions, all the family stuff that you need for a growing family. All the standard stuff but there’s nothing standard about the XJ sedan. This one has a longer wheelbase. It looks like a Ship of State. A long wheelbase piece of heaven.
The Maserati is a fantastic car. Even the four-door Maserati is very special, …there’s that word again. Sorry. Brain freeze, I suppose but a drive in a Maserati ends too soon. It’s a big smile. I couldn’t stop grinning and going fast in the Maz. Went to see Paul and to drive the Maz. Worth every second of this short life. Made up my mind to buy the car. Four door sedan. Just what I need at this stage of my life. A very very fast, gorgeous car in a special blue paint that’s worth stopping at Kerbeck to just have a look. Look at the clock. Best damn designed clock in a car ever. Worth the trip.
Came back to the parking lot and told Paul I wanted to look at the red cadillac SUV inside the showroom. the one I saw when I was walking around waiting for Paul. It was gone. Sold. Two guys were looking at it when I was out driving the Maz. They probably bought it. Another special car.
So I went back outside and looked inside the Jag. Beautiful. White leather interior trimmed with gorgeous polished wood. Probably from some exotic tree that only grows in moonlight. Drove it and it wasn’t the Maz. Had my heart set on the Maz but the Jag flew around during the test drive. Parked it and Paul opened the hood.
Supercharged. Written on the top of the engine twice. Supercharged. . . . that explained why the car was so fast. Supercharged. That got me. I told Paul I’d like to buy the car but we need to talk about the price. We went inside. Frank Kerbeck was walking around in a green t-shirt. He saw me and came over to say hello. He looks just like he does on TV, .. on the commercial. Plus, in person, he’s a great guy. Made me feel like I knew him from before. Talked about the families. Talked about the cars.
Frank Kerbeck collects cars and has about six of the most special American cars ever made on display in the showroom. That’s another set of reasons to stop in. Walk around these special cars from the ’50’s, the 60’s. Frank Kerbeck restored them. They are gorgeous. Worth a visit. If you love cars, stop in and look at them. They aren’t for sale. Who can sell things they love?
So the Jag is home now. It’s an adventure. A lot of money but buying a dream isn’t always cheap and there’s nothing cheap about the XJ. Satisfaction doesn’t have to cost a lot. The Jag doesn’t cost as much as a Rolls. Far from it.
Should you buy a Rolls? Depends. It’s expensive to buy and to maintain. Like a lot of things, tickets for the rides at Disney, smiles and laughter from kids, a lifetime with one special person, children, grandchildren, great grandchildren, …. there are these special things and when you can you get them.

Signed, Bill O’Neill

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