*There was an old Scot called McTavish Who attempted an anthropoid ravish.

But the object of rape Was the wrong sex of ape, And the anthropoid ravished McTavish.

*The first man to **** Brigid Brophy Was awarded the Krafft-Ebing trophy, Plus £10,000 quid Which, for what the chap did, Will be widely denounced as a low-fee.

*AT THE ZOO There was plenty of good-natured chaff When I popped in to **** the giraffe, And the PRZS Could hardly suppress A dry professorial laugh.

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