“…An apology may be one of the least costly and most rewarding investments you can make.” That’s immoral. Unfortunately, it’s believed, accepted and practiced by most people. The immoral theory is: apologize and move on. Limit the damage, contain the consequences, keep it quiet and people will forget it. Immoral? Sure. Common? Of course.
“I’m sorry people were offended” is not an apology. It’s like saying my comment backfired so I’m sorry, …. but saying I meant to do it is worse. It’s a further attack which is the conclusion after analyzing Joe Scott’s false apology. He’s the Republican Committeeman who used a slur against a Northampton Supervisor and Joe got caught. The apologetic maliciousness that underlay the original insult was amplified by the false apology.
Wait, you say. How do we know the apology was false? By using the meanings of the words. ‘I apologize but’ are the three lookout words. When they are separated by words and phrases they become more difficult to notice but in the case of Joe Scott they are simple to spot.
There’s a book, “Forgive Me But I Meant To Do It” that has scores of similar false apologies. Joe Scott has plenty of false apologizers for company including Anthony Weiner, Eliot Spitzer, Bob Filner, Gary Hart and Bill Clinton. Some think Scott’s disparagement of some of our most loved children was a slip of the tongue but he refused to acknowledge his thoughts. He only said he used the wrong word. His problem is the word he used revealed his wrong thinking. It was the thought or rather the thoughtlessness of the man not his word use that caused his problems.